That's right, folks! (Be sure to say the 'l' in folks like they do in the South, home of the Kremes, where these 'nuts grow wild on the roadside and knee-high by the fourth of July). Jake just spotted this sign outside the Krispy Kreme on Superstition Springs.
Is this real? Is this a mean and tardy April Fool's Day prank? Does anybody know anything about this? Why haven't you told me?
Anyway. MAY 13! Whatever shall I wear? I am tingling with anticipation.
But wait. Now that I've had a little time to think about it, I'm not so sure it's a good thing. Krispy Kreme is like a bad-boy, bad-for-me ex-boyfriend, to whom I keep returning. At inopportune times. After I've already gotten over him. Learned to live without him.
I won't lie. Things were bad for awhile when he first left, but now I've found healthier replacements for that co-dependant relationship. I mean, we totally ended things as friends. I've seen him around a little, and it has been okay. Not weird at all. We're like Bruce and Demi. Really, it would be impossible to avoid him in my travels. He's so cosmopolitan. The last time we met up was nearly a year ago, in London:
Honestly, it has been months since I've driven by his old place to see if the lights were on and he was back in town.
But now he IS back, I can't say no, and I'll let him woo me, lure me in, even though I know it'll never work between us. But he looks good, he smells good, and I already know we have a great time together, even if afterwards I feel sick, guilty, and swear I'm never going back for more. But then I do. Things were much easier when he was out of the state. I am a weak woman. A weak woman with glaze on her chin.
Maybe this time, the Krispy Kreme and I can just be friends. I don't need to jump right back into something I can already see will have a miserable, unhappy ending (my rear ending), right? I can set up some boundaries, like:
1. Can't use the drive thru. It is dangerous for us to be alone in the car together. I might end up doing something I'll regret later.
2. Can't get doughnuts after dark. A single doughnut during the day, well, that's just sociable; A box at home in the evening? That sounds like a date. Plus, would would my new scale think?
3. Can't ever buy one of those discount cards that gives me two dozen for the price of one. It is an evil trap. Those doughnuts seem so cheap, but who ends up feeling cheap in the long run? Uh-huh. You know.
Anyway. Welcome back, Krispy Kreme. I did miss you. Wal-Mart doughnuts are disgusting, and though the churros at Costco are tasty, things just haven't the same while you were away. Save me a raised, glazed, creme-filled.
I'll see you soon.