So, all the excitement is over. New York, Coldplay, lovely visitors, and Thanksgiving. And while it was all very fun and exciting, I cannot say that I am sorry that things will come back to normal. I am actually the sort of girl who likes her excitement by the teaspoon, so that I may savor it.
Jake has taken all the children and gone to dinner with his family at the Old Spaghetti Factory (bless his saintly soul), and I am all alone. This solitude is a rare and exciting in itself. I was feeling a bit contrary, because my planned and plotted nap this afternoon had been foiled, and I thought, I can totally picture myself in a big tub, bubbles up to my eyeballs, holding one of those long-handled cigarrettes from ye olden days of back knows when.
The mental image was very pleasurable, in a dangerous, old Hollywood way. But it isn't what nice Mormon ladies do, right? Or really, what any smart ladies anywhere do, who don't want cancer or stinky hair. Which is like, everybody. Or ought to be, anyhow. Plus, how weird would I look, when the drug addiction had grown, and could not be contained to my bathtub, flicking tobacky ashes from that foot-long cig out the window of my blue Honda minivan? Totally not gamorous, right?
So instead, I got in the tub with a frisbee-sized chunk of pumpkin pie and about 2 cups of whipped cream (please be advised that whipped cream is not one of those things I enjoy more by the teaspoon, like excitement), and read The Geurnsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society until my toes grew raisiny, and the water tepid.
Bliss, people.
Also, don't hate me, but I didn't gain any weight in New York. Even though I really should have. If only due to the many, many blueberry scones I ate with clotted cream every morning. And that was just breakfast. Perhaps I have a tape worm?
So now, I've grown bit cocky, and feel like maybe I'm some sort of superhero who's rear is immune to pie and scones. Which is a slippery mental slope, I know, but what a fantastic superpower, eh? Luckily, I've almost eaten the pie up, so the leftovers problem will be moot, soon enough.
After I've polished off the jell-o salad, anyhow.
Thanksgiving is a lovely, lovely holiday.
More on New York, Coldplay, and our fabulous Utah visitors later. I'm going to go paint my fingernails and catch up on some TV.
11 comments:
What I want to know, nay, NEED to know, is how do you manage a huge piece of pie AND a book in the bathtub? Because, I really wanna play yet it seems too undoable for motor-skill-lacking moi. (I think I could handle the long handled cig, though.) (Too bad it's against the plan an' all because it seems so glam.)
Fabulous post! I can't believe that you didn't gain any weight in NYC. You and your sis can sure put it away, and yet you all seem to maintain your girlish figures. Unfair!
And, yes, Thanksgiving is a fab holiday.
Missed you at OSF last night! Sam is requesting to come stay for 7 days over Christmas!!
Wow - impressive with the pie and all. You have talent girl! Glad you enjoyed the festivities!
The air is thinner in New York. And most people up there don't pay their gravity bills, so when you come back to real life, then the truth will come out. Evidence on the scale, my friend.
And I agree with Heidi. Whatever your secret to the pie-and-book-in-bathtub (as well as send-kids-out-with-dad) trick, I think you patent it and make a million dollars.
Is simple, really. Pie goes on the edge of tub, book goes in one hand. You don't have any hands left for scrubbing, so you have to start with lots of bubble bath.
Hope that the bubbles and pie have helped you regain the inner peace that we tried so hard to derail during our wonderful visit. And perhaps I shall try your tub/pie diet--sounds perfect for keeping the weight at bay this time of year.
Who needs inner peace when she's got pie? Glad to see you made it home! We had a blast. Kids are asking when you'll be back. I told them next turkey day.???
thanks for finding my blog. maybe we ARE soulmates because I agree that what goes on in my mind often isn't what is actually going on. also I graduated from byu with millions of credits--I just took random classes until eventually they added up to a degree. I never worked for FARMS but I did work for BYU Studies. and my husband is a Mormon historian. so I'll be checking you out!
I love the 1993 picture. Seriously, I had such big hair I would have to be paid some big money to display such a pic. You look cute! Fun post!
Love your blog though I can't remember how I ever found it. I also didn't gain any weight during Thanksgiving, but lost a few pounds! What's up with that? I was fully prepared to be disgusted when I stepped on the scale. Now I'm wondering if I've been going about this all wrong and I should continue eating nonstop, grabbing whatever is placed in front of me. Treadmill, schmeadmill.
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