Another tale from the Odyssey.
(It has black leather seats and lots of cup holders and I used to judge women like me, but now I know that whoever invented the minivan should get a Nobel Prize for being smarty and awesome.)
Tom: Momma, my toe is ouch! Look at my BLOOOOOOD!
Me: I can't see it. I'm driving.
Lengthy pause while he examines his toe more closely.
Tom: Momma, do you think Jesus hit me?
Me: I doubt it.