Note to self: Do not buy Swiss cake rolls for "children's lunches"

Some child-o-mine is going to read this post title and say: 

Swiss cake rolls? I didn't get any Swiss cake rolls in my lunch.

And I will have to confess, sheepishly:

Why, no, you didn't, small person. You won't get one, neither. 

For they have all been consumed. Your mama ate them. She cannot be left alone in the house with the Swiss cake rolls. Is unsafe cake roll environment.

And so, you may never taste a Swiss cake roll, darling offspring of my heart, cause mama isn't buying any more, ever again. She has a little self-control problem with the cake rolls, even though they are a little bit grossy-ish. 

But they are cake. 

And they have a creamy filling. 

And that is enough for Mama. 

Who has low standards as well as low control over her baked good consumption.

Is a dangerous combination, mi hijito. 

(My tiniest poodly-puppy. My sandwich of ham. My itty-bitty cake roll.)

Es muy peligroso. 

(Mama thinks lots of people share her weakness. Otherwise, Hostess would not be doing such a brisk business.)

Poor Mama wishes she had some more Swiss cake rolls right now.