Crack for Babies

At Costco a few days ago I bought some freeze dried fruit called Brothers All Natural Crisps. This morning I gave some of the apples to Tommy, and here is what followed:

1. His eyes got sort of shiny and glazed over, and he stopped blinking so much. (Not that he is a heavy blinker, anyway).

2. He started shoveling them in with both hands.

3. He started humming.

4. He stopped watching Wow, wow, Wubzy.

5. He finished them (the package says the equivalent of 1.5 apples) and he began to scream for more.

6. He pooped his pants. Now, to be fair, this may have been unrelated.

7. I gave him a package of the strawberry banana ones and he ate those, too (equivalent of 1 banana and 4 strawberries).

8. I cut him off. I am afraid those things will rehydrate in his stomach and we will have to go to the ER.

9. He threw a fit. He grabbed on with both hands to the high chair, stiffened his legs, and screamed when I tried to pull him out.

Apparently, these are actually pretty healthy. 6 grams of sugar and 45 calories. There is nothing in them but fruit minus the water. He has had freeze dried fruit before. I don't know how these are different, but they are different. The only problems I can foresee are these:

1. We might need a second income to keep Tommy (and Sam. He liked them as well) in Crisps. I guess it is good they are at Costco, because we will need to buy in bulk.

2. Tommy's reaction was kind of scary. I am afraid that if allowed, he would eat them until he made himself grievously ill, like a dog with chocolate.

I propose that Costco should treat these like the controlled substances, and keep them under lock and key in the pharmacy. It is the only responsible thing to do with baby crack.