Wednesday, September 12, 2007

You smell like IHOP! and...The Natural Man goes to Fry's

This morning while I was doing Jane's hair she asked me, "Are we rich?" Well, my 8.5 years of parental experience have taught me you don't answer this kind of question with a yes or no, when "What do you mean?" will get you all kinds of fun information.

She elaborated: "Well, I don't mean, like, we're so rich we have $4,000 or something."

"Sure," I replied carefully.

"I mean, we are rich because we have lots of food and tables and quilts."

"Uh, huh..." (Jake would haul all the quilts off to Goodwill if I gave him the chance, we live in the desert and don't need so many quilts).

She continues,"I think Kilynn is rich. She has a cell phone. Plus, the other day she got to school late, and she smelled like IHOP, and she had a sticker that said 'Happy Birthday'."

I thought about this for a minute. "You have a very keen sense of smell. Kilynn could very well be rolling in the dough. But how do you know what IHOP smells like? If you've been there, you must be rich, too."

This seemed to appease her.

"Men are motivated by greed and fear," my Dad said cryptically on the phone last night. I had just returned from the sale at Fry's, and was telling him about my loot. 45 cans of soup for $7.50! (Thanks to Liz and Jane for the scoop.) It was such a rush, it takes me back to the heady days of Couponsense, going to Albertsons and spending 10 bucks and saving 200, or something crazy like that.

So I've been thinking. The natural man is motivated by greed and fear. (I hope I sometimes act on other, higher motivations, like love.) The Fry's trip was a great time for my natural man. Finally, a way to assuage my fear while I feed my greed! "If ye are prepared ye shall not fear"(D&C 38:30). We Mormons are constantly squirreling away food in preparation for a rainy day. A full pantry does makes me happy. Plus, a deal! A full pantry for almost nothing! It was enough motivation to get me back into my brassiere and out to a grocery store in unsavory Apache Junction at 8:30 pm on a Tuesday. When I should have been in bed reading Sense and Sensibility. Like a sensible girl.

But now, we're rich! Rich in quilts and cheap soup! Which, honestly, is better than 4000 bucks any day. Right?


Sarah said...

45 can for $750!!? I wish I was rich like you. That's rich that your daughter smelled IHOP on her friend. to me the smell of IHOP is the hash browns.

Thanks for the comment on my site - I always love knowing who's hanging around my place. If you don't mind, I've linked you up to my site so I can keep an eye on my heavily quilted family to the east. Take care!

Kristen said...

Hi-larious! Ok, so I clicked on your link from Mel's blog...Aaron's wife here. Kids say the funniest things. I love hearing stories like this. And I LOVE getting a good sale. It goes along with my motto "I can't afford NOT to buy it."